July 24, 2018

Selah

Despite not being the biggest fan of the beach, I recently found myself 3 hours away from Manila laying on a beach chair on the shores of Anvaya Cove. Coming out of an exhausting and demanding semester, I knew I needed to recharge. For the past few weeks, I've been sleeping in and binge-watching TV series which is the dream if I'm being completely honest. But for some reason, I felt quite adventurous and decided that a day trip to Bataan would help satisfy my unusual need to be at the beach. There was something about having sand underneath my feet and the salty sea breeze blowing in my face that felt inviting. 

Usually, I would have gone out of my way to take hundreds of photos of the beach. But after twenty minutes of trying to figure out which camera settings worked best under the scorching heat of the sun, I realized I wanted to reflect and let my stream of consciousness flow. While all my friends were swimming in the sea, I found myself enjoying the comfort of the beach chair and the company of my thoughts.

Here were some of my thoughts:
  • Sleep is a beautiful gift from God that I should cherish more often.
  • There exists a healthy balance between staying in our comfort zones and going out of it and I need to find that balance.
  • There's nothing more relaxing than being with friends.
  • My health is a priority and a non-negotiable when it comes to commitments.
  • I need to be honest about my situation before I can improve it.
  • Uncomfortable conversations are beautiful and important. I should value them more.
  • The beach is not as bad as I thought.
Coming home to my bed, my body wanted to collapse and hibernate for the next five months. But I felt restored. Having had that time to reflect and meditate on life, I felt like I could finally breath again. With each exhale, I felt the weight of doubt and worry leave me. After months of feeling burnt out and empty, I finally began to enjoy living again. While there will definitely be some time before I find myself at the beach again, returning then will be much more exciting knowing the beach holds more than just sand and the sea.

Return, O my soul, to your rest;
for the Lord has dealt bountifully with you. 
Psalm 116:7 (ESV)
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